Nobody likes Dave.

Especially Gabby.

Random Celebrity Encounter

Man, I can't wait until I meet Ben Affleck on this thing so I can ask him how his baby's doing.

Fuck shit fuck

We may never know why.

Why all the cussin'.

Understanding

It just was

Deep, man.

Doubledown

The conversation then turned real (aka boring) for just a few moments before she left.

Too lazy

Stanley Cup

Happy to talk to a 14-year-old girl... but only if it's about sports.

Rock music

Sometimes, there is a bit of a pause between the last line and the disconnect, which doesn't come across on the conversation.

That was not the case here. Here, it was straight up "yay - disconnect."

Dubble-Yews

Of note: This conversation did continue, but this is the bit I had fun with.

Blip blorp

Snappy answers to stupid questions this ain't.

Tripping balls

My hope is that those last two thoughts were unrelated.

At the parade

Revenues

This got old after a while.

A long night of disappointment waits.

This is not the ideal way to go about... anything.

Thanks for asking.

Damn, and I was ready for a serious heart-to-heart.

You be the judge.

I don't know any jokes

Not this again

Short and sweet

A special moment

Close

I hope somehow he find that special someone... but I've always been a romantic.

Uncle Larry

I remember you!

It takes all sizes

I just wanted to make her feel appreciated.

I just can't win.

I'd like to add one that I was unable to screencap, so you'll have to take my memory for it:

Stranger: If my penis were named ronald mcdonald I'd hamburgle your onion ring until ketchup came out.

Which doesn't even make sense because McDonald's doesn't even have onion rings.

And who puts ketchup on those??

Sheesh.

You can't blame me for asking.

What can I say? I'm only human.